Fifty Rules To Live By

The author and Albert / Photo by J.J. Shannon / Art by Banksy.

I’m Spyder Darling. In my 60 years of walking the Earth I’ve been some places, done some things and learned a few lessons. Some more serious than others. Such as…

  1. It doesn’t have to be super perfect. In most cases regular perfect is just fine.
  2. Don’t drown in water that’s already under the bridge.
  3. Sooner kicks later’s ass.
  4. Under the skin, there is but one color.
  5. Get after it before it gets after you.
  6. Today it’s not too late. But tomorrow it might be.
  7. Abs are revealed or concealed in the kitchen.
  8. Empathy = Mercy…


Monday Morning Driver

Photo F1.com

“Racing is life. Everything else is just waiting.” — Steve McQueen

Szia Formula 1 Fans! Spyder “Goggles” Darling here with all the hybrid turbo news, views and attitude you can use regarding Alpine’s Esteban Ocon’s first ever F1 win at Sunday’s Hungarian Grand Prix at the historic Hungaroring Circuit in the tree filled hills northeast of Budapest.

After weaving through a first lap fracas that found Ocon in a position he is unaccustomed to, leading the race, Esteban remained flawless for the rest of the day and finished ahead of Aston Martin’s Sebastian Vettel and Mercedes’ Lewis…


Good Enough To The Last Drop

Photo by Jack Carter on Unsplash

Oh shit, there’s none left in the pot

Or in the pan on the stove

Gonna need it for the morning

Not gonna want to do it then

Grumbling out the old grounds

Putting in a fresh filter

Counting scoops

Not enough for a whole pot

God damn

Now how much water do I use

These are not the kind of questions

That are best answered at 2:00 AM

Hell, half the usual ought to do

Or at least be strong enough

To get us up and out the door

After all

Ain’t that…


Reflections On A 70 Year Old Fad

Photo: Spyder Darling

For Elvis, Chuck, Richard and Bo

Pearls and pigs, rusty rigs

Getting, petting, make it big

Give and take, hearts go break

Tails a wagging, shake and bake

No excuse, ingenuous

Offers too good to refuse

Tomorrow’s past, what a blast

Lose yourself inside a whiskey glass

Ain’t talking ‘bout hip hop or funk

Or new age classical junk

Reggae’s alright if you’re stoned

Otherwise leave it alone

Talking ‘bout rock and roll

Talking ‘bout rock and roll, roll

Talking ‘bout rock and roll,

Talking about rock and roll

Wheel and deal, sex…


365 Words For 365 Days

Photo by phil cruz on Unsplash

So it’s been a year now

Since I put down the bottle

No more whiskey, vodka, tequila or rum for me

I decided on a whim

On the way to the liquor store in fact

Slightly ahead of my usual resupply schedule

One steamy summer New York City evening

A voice in my head simply said

“Mr. Wilford would prefer it if you didn’t do that.”

“Mr. who?” you might ask

None other than the heroic villain and despotic designer of Snowpiercer fame

And for some odd reason, that as they say was that

I…


Suspenseful, Scenic and Semi-Surprising

Photo: Universal

2021 might not be the “Summer Of Love,” but thanks to M. Night Shyamalan’s Old, a beachy, scary, cool movie will do to help cure the pandemic blues for a couple hours. And thanks to an invite from the good PR people at Universal I was inspired to see a movie in a New York City theater for the first time in a year and a half.

And so, on a hazy, humid July evening I journeyed uptown on a mostly empty 1 train to see M. Night’s latest the way it was meant to be…


Monday Morning Driver

Photo: Formula1.com

“The closer you are to death, the more alive you feel. But more powerful than fear itself, is the will to win.” — James Hunt

Cheerio Formula 1 Fans! Spyder “Goggles” Darling here with the high speed, tire flying news you can use regarding Lewis Hamilton’s controversial win at Sunday’s British Grand Prix in front of a capacity crowd of 140,000 sun-baked, non-socially distanced fans at the historic Silverstone Circuit in Northhampshire, England.

After a qualifying weekend that saw F1’s first ever 100 Km Sprint Race to determine Sunday’s starting grid position, the bedlam began almost from…


Till I See You Again

Photo: S.W. Hampson

For Jack, Karen, James and Dennis

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday

By Friday I gotta go

January, February, March, April

As sure as the melting snow

And I don’t know how

And I don’t where

And I sure can’t tell you why

But when this restless blood heats up

It’s time for me to fly

Color me gone, gone like the wind

Color me gone, hope to see you again

Color me gone, gone like the wind

Till I see you again

One, two, three, four five easy pieces

That I know how to play

I…


And your front side too…

Photo: Spyder Darling

For Lou, Iggy, David and Mick

Hey pouty baby

I know you’ve been around

Waking up in the lost and found

Black and blue

Behind mirrored shades

Ain’t foolin’ no one

You ain’t slept in days

It ain’t easy

When you’re on your own

One eye open

Until the dawn

I got your back

And your front side too

I got your back

It’s the least I can do

I got your back

While you do your thing

I got your back

Just give me a ring

I’ll be the eyes

In the back of…


Monday Morning Driver

Photo: Formula1.com

Ain’t No Stoppin’ Max Now!

Guten tag again Formula 1 Fans! Spyder “Goggles” Darling here with the hybrid turbo news you can use regarding “Mad Max” Verstappen’s “Grand Slam” win at last Sunday’s Austrian Grand Prix at The Red Bull Ring in Spielberg, Austria.

In addition to the “Grand Slam” distinctions below, the win was Verstappen’s third in a row and he has yet to finish lower than second when starting from pole position. …

Spyder Darling

Born in upstate New York, raised on Long Island, been some places, done some things, currently living in New York City. You got a problem with that?

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